This season, we’ve decided to use one word (some real, some made up) to describe the mindset, outlook or position that each team is in heading into 2016.
Drop your predictions for the NFC West in the comment section below!
Let me start this review off with the following declaration; I have a resounding hate for this entire division. As a life-long cheesehead these four franchises — especially the big three of Seattle, Arizona and San Francisco — have caused me untold amounts of heartache in both the regular season and playoffs. I hope they lose all of their games and get nothing but draft busts going forward. With that said, I am going to be as objective as I can possibly be. So without further ado…
San Francisco 49ers- Distraction
You’ve assuredly heard by now about Colin Kaepernick and his silent protest which has gotten him branded a hero, a traitor and everything in between. You can debate the merits of the protest (100% valid), the manner of protest (truth is there is no acceptable way to protest racial injustice in the America) and even the potential for any lasting impact of the protest (hard to see much actually coming from it IMO), but what you can’t debate is that the San Francisco 49ers will stink like milk left behind the refrigerator for five months!
The team recently went through a talent and coaching exodus of such a large proportion, you’d think a Pete Carroll/USC type scandal was coming down the pipeline. Players were let go (Gore, Vernon Davis), others surprisingly retired (Patrick Willis, Chris Boreland) and Jim Harbaugh either got bounced or bounced to Michigan to lose to Ohio State and get discount khaki pants. Also within the last few days they released thug and fullback Bruce Miller after he apparently beat up an old man and his 29-year-old son.
Sidebar: I’m positive something was up and the NFL version of Jack Bauer came in an diffused the bomb right before it blew up and ruined the opening of the new stadium. I just know it!
This team has a dearth of talent on both sides of the ball and it won’t be long before Chip Kelly is running what little talent is left out of town (looking at you Navarro Bowman!) Face it fans: Steve Young and Jerry Rice aren’t walking through that door. Hell, Jeff Garcia and Terrell Owens ain’t either!* The QB situation is garbage— for the record I fully expect Kaep to regain the starting job before the season ends if only to showcase him for a potential trade. Turf toe is scarier than the 49er pass catchers. It’s starting to look like former Buckeye Carlos Hyde may be J.A.G at the NFL level. The rest of the skill players on offense are a by bunch of retreads or no treads.
It’s a little bit shocking that this team was in control of the Super Bowl in 2012 before Beyoncé overpowered the electrical grid. The Niners are at the bottom now and looking at a 3-4 win season, but at least Colin Kaepernick is leading SportsCenter AND Anderson Cooper 360, giving the world a noteworthy distraction from this piss poor state of this once great franchise.
*Terrell Owens became T.O. when he completely styled on the Packers secondary in the NFC wildcard game in 1999, giving the 49ers their first ever playoff win in Lambeau. I was 14 and will have hated them ever since.
Los Angeles Rams- Blackmail
The Rams have moved back to Los Angeles, they bring with them the best candidate to take the mantle of best running back in football from Adrian Peterson, a defensive front seven that rivals anything the best in the NFL has to offer, a potential franchise quarterback waiting in the wings in Jared Goff and the single most mind-boggling continuing coaching tenure in major American sports.
I can’t for the life of me understand how the Rams decided to bring Jeff “7 and 9 bullshit” Fisher along to LA and waste all of the guilt free losses they are going to acquire this season. The goodwill that comes along with bringing back the Rams to the Los Angeles area is a once…every 20 years experience! Don’t the Rams ownership know that people in LA have other things they can do rather than overpay for tickets to a see middling team? Isn’t that why the Rams have failed this LA experiment in the past?
They can’t not know this information so there can only be one answer…blackmail. Fisher has dirt on somebody up high in the Rams brain trust. Oh, and not only has Fisher (and GM Les Snead) been retained after never getting over .500 in the past four years with all of this talent it would appear they’re going to get contract extensions! Somehow in a league where a quarter of the coaching staffs are turned over annually, Fisher remains. The Philadelphia 76ers weren’t even trying to win games and they eventually canned Sam Hinke!
Week in and week out this team is competitive, especially in this division which has been top to bottom among the strongest in the league, and that counts for something. But you have to wonder how this team would perform with a good coach. Seems like moving a team cross country, trading up for the top pick in the draft and putting the team on Hard Knocks is the best way for a coach to inherit job security.
Seattle Seahawks- Reset
The Seattle Seahawks as we know them are dead. They finished second to the Cardinals in the division and I expect a repeat. Don’t get me wrong, the team is still good and should contend for a playoff spot barring major injury; the swagger, the aura of the team that was damn near unbeatable is gone. Seattle’s in the midst of a “soft reboot” and Russell Wilson is going to take a more starring role.
It started when they traded for Jimmy Graham, sending out lineman Max Unger to get more dynamic in the passing game at direct cost to the power running game. It continued when Pete Carroll opted for a pass play in the Super Bowl that handed the Patriots another championship. Marshawn Lynch’s retirement sealed it.
And we thought it was just the Rams that went Hollywood!
There is an interesting question surrounding the Seahawks: How good is Russell Wilson? Or better yet, is Wilson good enough to build the entire offense around his dual threat abilities? One more: Is Russell Wilson getting caught up by the fame?
Marshawn Lynch has retired and no one embodied the spirit of “The Seahawks” like he did. Here Lynch was quoted as saying, “If you just run through somebody face a lot of people ain’t gonna be able to take that over and over and over and over and over again. They just not gone want that.” Lynch’s spirit embiggend even the smallest man on the Seahawks, and while Thomas Rawls and Christine Michael are totally cromulent, they are no substitute “Beast Mode”.
Perhaps Pete Carrol knows this, which could be why rumors of unretirement are already beginning to bubble. Until then, it’ll be the Seattle defense and the annoyingly fiery play of Doug Baldwin and Michael Bennett that will have to fuel a return trip to the Super Bowl.
Arizona Cardinals- Builtforthisness
Did you know last year at 35-years-old Carson Palmer had his best season as a professional football player?
It was brought to my attention that the Cardinals more so than any contending team would be completely screwed if they suffered an injury at the quarterback position. This offense relies so heavily on Carson Palmer being the best version of himself that it has to leave head coach Bruce Arians a bit concerned.
This team is basically stacked on both offense and defense. There are studs at every nearly every skill position; the talent level in Arizona is beyond impressive. As always, it all comes back to the quarterback and if the playoffs last year showed us anything, it’s that Carson Palmer can not ignore the pressure, and if he gets hit early, he’s going to toss the ball to the other team. In the Divisional game in January, the Packers had the Cards right where they wanted them but the secondary just couldn’t hold onto the wounded ducks that Palmer was slinging in the desert. The Panthers had no such problem as they brutalized Palmer in the NFC Championship, officially exercising the Jake Delhomme demons of years past against the Cards, as Palmer went “Full Delhomme“.
Maybe it’s because USC puts out overrated quarterbacks or maybe it’s because some 300 pound rube from Pittsburgh broke his leg in half when he played in Cincinnati eons ago, but Palmer is the weak link of a very impressive chain in Arizona. Palmer should regress back to the mean, resulting in Cardinals having to save him from himself in a similar but not as drastic situation the Broncos dealt with last year. David Johnson becomes a workhorse back and the defense — aided by the addition of Chandler Jones and the return of The Honey Badger — continues to play well and leads to another division title. But are the Cardinals really built for anything beyond a division title? No one can answer this question better than Carson Palmer.
Anthony’s NFC West Champs: Arizona Cardinals
Kenneth’s NFC West Champs: Arizona Cardinals
Justin’s NFC West Champs: Seattle Seahawks